Links in some blog posts may earn a commission for The Brain Cleanup Coach.
Love IS unconditional.
Other emotions place conditions on love.
Fear. Anger, Disappointment. Regret. Inadequacy.
You require others to allow you to let you love them a certain way, trying to box up love into a container of the other emotions you attach to love. For instance, you could attach your own mistrust of yourself to the love you offer to others. That’s like trying to bottle love into a mistrust jar.
You might think “you should let me love you this way so I can feel…”:
“If you don’t let me love you this way I will feel…”:
See how the human mind tries to bend love to its will? It takes honesty to recognize how your own brain is trying to control the experience of love with other emotions.
But love is like air. It can not be controlled. You can try to box it, jar it, cover it with something, try and mash it and squish it and make it conform to how you think love should look in your life, but in the end, it penetrates everything.
It’s the human tendency to try and control things that creates the illusion that they can control love.
But if love is like air, just something that surrounds us and is available for the giving and the taking, they we’re just fooling ourselves through other thoughts and emotions of the brain.
- I need to do this to be loved.
- They need to do this to be loved.
Love requires nothing. That’s kind of hard to wrap the brain around, huh? But it’s true. All it takes is recognizing that love is there. We forget that. We train that recognition out of each other by creating obstacles to love. That’s the equivalent of training babies to teach their lungs not to breath until they’ve earned it.
Love is showing up everyday. It surrounds you. All you have to do is take a breath.